Ok, so. I’ll provide a longer update later, but for now, I have some Very Important Opinions (okay, these are actually exceptionally trivial opinions, but whatever, we’re going to pretend that they’re important) about Starbucks.
Look, I know I spend waaaaayyy too much time staring into the void of caffeine consumption — but the reality is that I’m deeply, profoundly basic. Ergo, my veritable cornucopia of Starbucks opinions. Anyways. Behold.
1) As much as I love PSLs, I’m certain that eggnog lattes are even better. Are they approximately eleventy bajillion calories? Yes. Do I need all that sugar and dairy in my life? Not even remotely. Does any of that deter me? Nope.
2) Mobile ordering is the best thing since, like, the invention of the wheel. Anything that allows me to skip the line while clandestinely customizing my drink (look, I get embarrassed when I’m ordering in person and I have an absurdly long and complicated drink; I can feel people’s judgment drilling into the back of my skull) is a huge win.
3) Mobile ordering also is the only way my name gets spelled correctly. Nalin/Sillian/Luann/Lorraine/Lauren/Hillian/Killian/ is funny at first, but it gets old quickly.
And thus, I have spent my Sunday morning opining about a coffee chain.